It got to a stage where everything I do is part of a routine.
Wake up late, prepare in a hurry, drink a sip of tea, head out to work, road rage, reach the office, put my stuff on my desk, drink a cup of water followed by a cup of milk sided with cereal. I go to the other offices, chat for half an hour and go back to my desk, open my laptop and start working (and fighting off the distractions).
Lunch break, watch series and then chat with my office mates. Back at my desk, work till shift is over. Rush to my car, road rage, have a small dinner, rest a bit, then head to the gym. Workout for two hours (because I have nothing else to do and plus I want to stay away from night eating). Get home, shower, watch tv with mom, read a bit then go to sleep.
Wake up late. Remember that I have to get some work done, have a late breakfast and watch tv for 1 hour, go to my room, fix and dust it. Then go to the gym, workout for 2 hours then head back, road rage, shower, late lunch, watch tv till there’s nothing, go to my room, read, skype with siblings, then go to sleep.
I feel useless; I’m wasting my energy on nothing… literally, nothing!
It feels easy and good and it’s very addicting!
All I know is … the clock is ticking and I haven’t done anything yet!
She couldn’t take it anymore! She packed her things in a school bag and got into her 1965 Blue Ford Thunderbird. She turned on the engine and turned up the volume to The Beach Boys. She pulled to Drive and drove away.
I’ve always wanted to drive away to a new place I’ve never been to, and to explore new roads and people. Just thinking about it relaxes me and makes me ‘aaah’.
The feeling of getting lost alone is exciting, frightening and relieving all at the same time. It gets your mind off daily issues such as housework, traffic, work, and family. I wish we could drive our worries away, pack them in the trunk of the car and send them away….
One day, I’ll be that girl in the Blue Thunderbird….
You never understand the real meaning of something until it’s too late.
I’m in my twenties now. It’s a stage in life where one should be young, wild, free and living their days like their last.
Instead, I spend my day off wasting time and being lazy. I have a full-time job Monday through Friday. After work, I either head off to the gym or spend happy hours with my co-workers. On weekends, I spend half of the day sleeping and the other half watching series, and reading. My life right now is an easy routine that I can’t get out of.
This is a time where I should be working on myself, taking risks, dating, partying, trying new talents, travelling to a new city alone,….
But the world is getting harder and harder to live in with more obstacles that threaten one’s life and places fear in our parents’ hearts. I guess living with my parents and their rules, and the requirement to take permission to decide is my obstacle. Also, being the only daughter left at home with them leaves them more attached and harder to let go, and the only way out is to leave and live alone abroad.
It’s a period in my life that is worth remembering and is about to disappear very soon.
I’m afraid I’ll leave a little too late and miss out on that part of my life.